We had narrowed down the style and important details of my “dream dress”, and had found three dresses that mostly lived up to those requirements, all at different bridal shops and at the extremes of my budget. The first was at Boulder Bridal — a unique strapless fit-and-flare with lace, beads, AND ruffles — at the low end of my budget at just over $900. The second from Anna Be, a beautifully simple strapless Martina Liana complete with sweetheart neckline, top to bottom buttons, and mermaid fit, for about $1300. Finally, a glamorous mermaid gown from Justin Alexander with tasteful beadwork at the empire waste and a distinctive crumb catcher top, with top to bottom buttons (alternating every fifth with similar beading to the top) — but for $1800.
Dress #1 from Boulder Bridal, with the lace, beading, and ruffles. It turned out to be too much for my taste, and I had a feeling Jeremiah would hate it.
I didn’t make a purchase the first two weekends we searched, but just KNEW that one of those three would be my dress. I’m an over-thinker: with every little decision, I weigh pros and cons, need the opinion of everyone from my grandmother to the guy who bags my groceries, discuss in length with my friends and Jeremiah… it’s a problem. So naturally, I had to talk to EVERYONE I encountered, including my poor office-mates and even my select after-school Girl Choir. My 7th and 8th graders had some truly mature advice on how to decide. They suggested that I choose the one that 1) Made me feel most special and bride-like, then 2) Go with the one I considered to be the most timeless. After seeing the pictures, they voted almost unanimously for the Martina Liana dress.
You should know, however, that the pictures were extraordinarily deceptive. My mom’s camera phone was feeling particularly ornery, and had locked on black and white when snapping Dress #2. I had just happened to pick up a hand-held mirror to look at the back, so everything looked longer and slimmer than I really am. In my favorite photo of Dress #3, I’m bent over slightly, the lighting is amazing, and my arms are tight along my sides so it hides the parts I am most self-conscious of — my hips. It sounds strange, but it is really a great photo. Neither picture really showed the dress how anyone would see it in real-life, or how it looked at different angles.
My mom came to Denver several weeks later, and I had already decided that I would probably be leaning very hard toward the Martina Liana dress and had completely eliminated Dress #1, the dress that had a little too much going on. It had everything I had been looking for – a sweetheart neckline, mermaid style that cut higher on my thigh (and therefore made my hips look smaller), buttons from head to toe, and a deep(ish)-cut back. It was lovely, and I was fairly certain I would purchase that one. They took my measurements *just in case*, and we left to see the other dress.
Once there, I looked at the fabric and was shocked that THAT was the fabric I had fallen in love with — it wasn’t nearly as glamourous as I remembered, and a darker ivory. I put it on, though, and loved how cool and soft it felt. The sample was humongous, and the consultant didn’t clamp it very well, but I remembered why I had felt so special in that dress. It was truly gorgeous, and was back in the running. The only real issue was that darn crumb catcher. It was so large and floppy — even more so than I remembered.
The consultant assured me (and tried to show me) that they could alter the top into a sweetheart, similar to the Martina Liana at the other store. It came with the beading already, so I wouldn’t have to buy an expensive belt to add bling and glamour. I kept hearing the voices of Brielle (one of my best friends and bridesmaid) and Laura (my cousin and fellow wedding fanatic) whispering “Choose the one that gives you ‘the feeling’,” and “It fits your venue and wedding style best.” There was one thing holding me back — when we had originally looked at it, my mom didn’t like it… at all, really. I’m a people pleaser, and especially so with my parents. If she didn’t like it, the deal was off. When we came back, however, she had a different opinion — she thought that it made me look the longest, tallest, and thinnest, and with the altered top, she thought it was the one. On top of that, the Little White Dress shop owner offered me 10% off the $1880 price tag, because she knew that was holding me back from the decision. I had already talked to Jeremiah about it being nearly DOUBLE our budget, and he assured me that I should choose the dress that was “the one” regardless of price, and we would adjust the wedding budget as necessary.
The decision was made! I paid my 50% deposit on the spot (over $900 — the price I had hoped to pay IN TOTAL for my dress), and left pleased and ready to continue planning with my mom. I scheduled an appointment the following Wednesday to be measured by the alterations expert that would be actually working on my dress, so I could ask her all about altering the top to make it have a sweetheart neckline. We were set… or so I thought…
